it seems unlikely…
LSS for the past 2 nights: you give me something by james morrison…
’cause you give me something that makes me scared, alright…
with barely a month of waiting, pauwi na ako ng canlubang. aaminin ko na excited ako, pero hindi ko maintindihan… i’m scared.
dunno why. going by the song…. SOMETHING… unfathomable for me as of now. i’ve never been scared like this before. not even the thought of flunking the board exam made me feel this way (fyi: i gloriously passed the chemical engineers’ board exam last may 2003 with flying colors). i don’t want to think about things… losing again? is it the one i’m afraid of? this could be nothing for most people but this is my struggle… my struggle to define who i am… to define my being…
i don’t know if me being here in yokohama really paid off. financially, maybe… emotionally? i guess not.
i’m willing to give it a try…
trying to reconstruct myself is such a big ordeal. it feels like i was devastated here… i’m just praying that i can be as flexible as i was before… i dunno now if i’m still like my old self in terms of flexibility…
now i’ve gotten too deep…
yeah… too deep. i can’t even understand myself… i’m such a cry baby, as always. too deep… did i get what i want? i dunno… i’m still scared.
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